Monday, January 30, 2017

Week 3 Storytelling: The Trip of a Lifetime

There once was a woman named Sarah, who was regarded as the mother of the Jews and the most radiant beauty in all the land; she was married to the great Abraham who was known as the father of the Jews. Sarah received word that one of her closest friends was getting married, so they set off to take a trip to Egypt to join in on the festivities. Abraham was hesitant to travel so far but his love for Sarah was so great that he would do anything she asked, also there was the matter of Sarah’s beauty.

Now normally such beauty would be a blessing, but when in a foreign land with a foreign ruler it became more of a curse. Abraham was terrified that the Pharaoh would take one look at Sarah and steal his wife without a second of hesitation. The Pharaoh gets what the Pharaoh wants. He would be powerless to resist the orders of the sovereign, so Abraham knew he had to devise a plan to conceal Sarah until they reached their friend’s house. The first idea was to put Sarah in a giant burlap sack and throw her over one of their donkeys, but that idea did not go over too well with Sarah. She thought it sounded a little too bumpy for her liking. So they finally decided to put Sarah in a giant box and if anyone asked what it was then Abraham would try to pass it off as a wedding present for their friend. 





When they arrived in Egypt the officials saw Abraham come through with his giant box, they were of course very intrigued and stopped to question him. He tried to act as though he was in a great hurry to make it to his friend’s wedding and that he did not have time to stop, but the officials could not be so easily thrown off. They would not let him pass without paying the duty for customs and they demanded to know what was inside. Abraham said he would pay the highest duty if they would just let him go, but of course that drove them even crazier with suspicion and they ordered Abraham to open the box. When the officials saw it was Sarah who was inside they all gasped, for she was as radiant as the sun. They knew they had to tell the Pharaoh at once because he would be sure to reward them for bringing him a prize as wonderful as Sarah.

Once they reached the palace the Pharaoh came out to greet them; he embraced Sarah and started barraging her with compliments on her unmatched beauty. Thinking quickly on her feet, Sarah introduced Abraham as her brother to which the Pharaoh was pleasantly surprised. This act saved her husband’s life and even though it enraged him, Abraham was wise enough to comply and hide his anger.

The Pharaoh told Sarah that he wanted to see her that night and sent his maids to help her prepare. Sarah was so afraid but she was also faithful and kept praying to God to keep her and her beloved safe. That night when the Pharaoh entered her chamber, something strange happened. Every time he reached out to touch Sarah, something would prevent him and he would get this unexplainable, excruciating pain. He was a little embarrassed at first because he was so confused as to what was happening, but Sarah knew exactly what was happening. It was her God coming to her deliverance. Despite the warning signs, the Pharaoh was not deterred until suddenly he was repeatedly thrown across the room. Sarah just stood there in awe as she watched her God work.


That episode proved to be enough for the Pharaoh; he wanted nothing to do with Sarah or Abraham. He loaded them up with provisions for their journey and made them promise that they would never return to his palace again. The Pharaoh was too embarrassed to tell anyone else what happened, so he decided to tell everyone that it was all just a big misunderstanding. The Pharaoh told Sarah that she was to say that she was actually Abraham’s wife, not his sister; Sarah just smiled because the Pharaoh thought he was being clever, but really he was just telling everyone the truth. Finally Abraham and Sarah were back on their way and arrived just in time to celebrate their friend’s wedding party.


Author's Note:

I kept this story somewhat close to the original, I did however add in the part about the friend's wedding to give them a reason for traveling to Egypt. I cut it down a little bit from the original, but kept the same general premise of God coming to Sarah's aide and rescuing her and Abraham from the Pharaoh. I just mainly the changed the major details of how the story unfolded. 


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6 comments:

  1. I have not heard of this story so it was very surprising to me. I liked how you gave him a reason to go to Egypt and that you gave it your own little spin off. It makes thins a little more creative and exciting to read instead of just the same story. I might have to try that next time. I also liked how every time he tried to touch her he would get burned or even to the point of getting thrown across the room because of it. It was funny that she made him her brother but how in the end the truth came out anyway. It was not in the most obvious way like it should have been but at least they both got out safely. They even made it on time to the wedding which was really cute. I look forward to reading your other stories in the future.

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  2. Interesting! I've never heard this story before, either, but your writing style is very clear and I appreciate your attention to grammatical detail. You gave good detail where it was needed, but it didn't bog down the story by any means. I most liked the detail about Sarah telling the Pharaoh that Abraham was her brother, just for the Pharaoh to turn around later and tell her to say Abraham was her husband. It felt like justice being served.

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  3. I loved this story, Savannah! You gave such good description and detail about Sarah's beauty and I loved the transition from saying it was a blessing at home, but not in a foreign country. My favorite part was their scheming to hide Sarah as they entered the city- I laughed out loud when Sarah was not amused! And the box they settled for was a hilarious twist to the story that I was not expecting. I felt bad for Abraham knowing that his beautiful Sarah was to be seen by the Pharaoh...I wonder what he was doing while she prepared and waited for him. What if he was possibly hiding out somewhere in or near the room to snoop and make sure nothing happened to Sarah? That would be an interesting addition for sure, though, slightly creepy if he was hiding in the room. I really liked your take on this story and your tone and word choice were perfectly incorporated! Fantastic job!

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  4. Great story! I really enjoyed the personality you gave to Sarah and her husband. It really shows when he is thinking about where to hide her and when she calls him her brother. I am glad you added a reason for them to go to Egypt because i would be wondering the whole time why they were going and getting into that mess. Some backstory on what Abraham was doing when Sarah was meeting with the Pharaoh would have added more depth to the story but overall it still felt whole. Adding more pictures would be nice but is not needed. I wonder how the story would go if the Pharaoh kept pursuing Sarah instead of leaving her alone. Maybe he can go follow them to the wedding and crash it but when he tries to grab Sarah he gets thrown in to a food table. Overall great story and can't wait to read more!

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  5. Good retelling on the original, quick and concise but covers the major plot points. The wedding party was a nice addition and it gives some more context as to why they would travel to Egypt. Interesting addition that the story ended on a happy note with Abraham and Sarah arriving at the party, whereas in the original Abraham just gave a warning to the Pharaoh and left.

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  6. Hi Savannah,
    I love weddings, so I like how you incorporated that into the story! The box concept was a little strange, but I can see how it sort of helped prevent Sarah from danger… even though that is not what really saved her. That took a unique turn and I’m glad she was not hurt. A couple that travels together stays together haha.

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